Being Human

Sometimes, figuring out how we relate to other people is difficult.  We're surrounded by other people day in and out, through the magic of the Internet, our phones, even just walking out the door, we're buffeted by the morass of humanity.  Socialization is truly a process that continues until death, as we have all encountered those times where we have no idea what to say or do.  Another person comes, beseeching something from us; using the multi-variate tools of communication, double or triple meanings, body language, gestures and facial expressions, but never out right saying what it is that they might want.  It's as if expressing it steals something from the game.  We as the receiver have to guess correctly, because being given the answer cheapens the experience on both ends somehow.

We've all seen the games played.  In the eyes of lovers searching your face, hoping to convey just what they are hoping for, or friends asking for help by pushing away or acting strong, but never actually asking.  Its painful because you know that there is something that you can say, a panacea to assuage their grief or heartache, but it is beyond your ken at the moment.  I've even seen it in reverse.  The most horrible person, able to show love and kindness to a small child, to take away anothers' hurt.  Con men use it all the time, their words hiding the guilt and evil, until the moment your grandmother gives them her social security number.  These things aren't outside our realm of imagining, because they happen in and around us daily.

Sometimes, I equate existence to a never ending struggle to figure out my own niche.  An experience that is both interwoven into the tapestry of humanity, while simultaneously being cut apart.  Sometimes you know just what to say, and the people will love you.  Other times you know the things NOT to say, and manage to muddle your way through the rest.  Rarely, you think that you know the password to anothers' heart, but it actually locks you out forever.  I think these are some of the most confusing moments, when you know there is something riding on it, celestial betting is heavy on the outcome, and you feel the pressure of the odds at your back.  You take that deep breath and blow on the proverbial dice of your words, but once they're gone, you can see it's gonna land snake eyes.